Soft Like You - EPILOGUE
by Stalpankaka
Summary: The epilogue was deleted from the story itself and I decided to post it separately.


**Soft Like You**

**EPILOGUE**

* * *

I wanted to surprise you. But it's hard to fly someone to New York, drag them through a city, into a building and up a long ass elevator ride and not have them notice so I had to tell.

"Geez, look at the line!" I exclaim when I see what looks like at least a hundred people waiting to do exactly what we're doing.

"Aren't there stairs we could take instead?" I whine and look around for them instead of meeting your eyes because I know how they will look.

"The stairs? To the top of the Empire State Building? Do you know how many stories that is?" You wrap your arms around me from behind and put your head on my shoulder. You like to always in some way hug me when you're protesting me. It makes you feel less harsh and you're so bad at feeling harsh, even if you've gotten a lot better at it.

"No." I pout and put my hands over yours to tell you that I like you hugging me right now and you're not being scary harsh like you have to be with me sometimes. You snuggle up in the crook of my neck.

"Me neither, but I bet there are a lot." You mumble against my skin and giggle at the vibration tickling your lips. Then you have to press a couple of kisses there just to make the lingering tickles stop.

"I just think you know... Some exercise might be good." I try to say casually and I might have half tried to make them stop; but my eyes are still looking for the door to the stairs. I don't think you're even allowed to take the stairs.

"Good as in exercise-away-the-salad-you-had-earlier-good?" Sometimes I hate that I've talked to you so much about it because... You always knew _me_ well but now you know _it _well too and you're so good at telling what's me and what's it and when you have to put your foot down.

"Maybe..." I murmur quietly. I could lie. Most of the time I still feel tempted to, but you'd know anyways and you'd call me out on it so it feels better to just be honest from the start. It's harder, but in the end I think that's what makes it feel better.

You exhale slowly right there in the crook of my neck and your arms wrap around me tighter; your hands hug me with adoration and even your fingertips show me how much you love those lbs I've gained since last summer. If I'm being completely honest I still hate them but I think, maybe, I hate them a little less every day.

"You didn't even eat the cheese." You say calmly. You have different ways of helping me depending on the situation. Sometimes, like now, you go for logic and reason. Or other times you'll plead to emotions which can be either telling me how much you love me, how beautiful I am and how proud you are of me or it can be crying or anger or desperation. In my head_ it_ has made them up to be techniques you use to trick me but_ I_ know it's just you and your big heart.

"You're right." I sigh and nod. I want to tell you that; while I didn't have the cheese; I did eat the croutons and they're starting to feel heavy in my stomach and at lest running up a million stairs is better than throwing up but I remind myself why we're here. Why I thought I was ready to finally take you here.

The line does move faster than I thought it would and when it's finally our turn to go on the elevator you squeal and squeeze my hand super tight. A man tells you to relax and then he starts talking about the safety measures of an elevator. He probably mistook your excitement for fear and I have to smile at knowing you better than that.

Elevators don't scare you. Neither do escalators, roller-coasters, shopping cart racing, go cart, motorcycles or horseback riding. But you don't like needles, knives, swords, "those guns that shoot arrows to kill fish", and you say you like snakes and vampires - you just don't like their sharp teeth.

You listen to the man anyways and nod like you're interested in everything he's saying. Every now and then you breathe _"cool"_ in actual awe of how much weight the average elevator can carry or how many rides this particular one has taken up and down. I don't really care about that stuff. But I do love watching your face while you listen to it.

How your eyebrows go up and your mouth falls open or shapes a perfect o. How your cheeks get a little rounder when you smile and your shoulder shake when you giggle at a lame word pun he makes. I think you're so beautiful, Brittany. You can go through hell and still find the little things in life exciting. You can live in darkness for such a long time and still find the light like it's the back of your hand and you knew it was there all along. I hold on to you tighter and you notice and turn your head to me. I don't mean to interrupt your conversation with the man but I can't help it when our eyes meet.

"You're pretty amazing, Brittany." I coo and you blush a little as you tilt your head down and mumble that I'm not so bad either. The man's voice fades when he sees you've stopped paying attention to him, but instead of being annoyed with you; a little smiles pulls under his mustache and he turns to his wife and takes her hand like we just reminded him how wonderful love can be.

The elevator doors open and we think we're there but it turns out there's more standing in line and a second elevator before you get to the fun part. Maybe I should have read up on all of this before I decided to take you here but it's okay. If you're going somewhere that matters; the way there is always a little longer than you expected anyways. You're getting restless and you roll impatiently on your feet from your heels to your tippy toes to your heels again. You lose balance and almost fall but I put my hand on your back and I'm strong enough to keep to upright.

You turn to me and lean in for a kiss but we get called forward because it's our turn. You give me a look that says saved-by-the-chunky-elevator-man-but-you're-not-es caping-my-kisses-that-easily and I giggle because I wouldn't dare try to escape your sweet lady kisses. This elevator ride is shorter and when we're there you bounce up and down until the doors open you dart out; not quite sure of where to go but trying no to let me see that.

I don't know either but I hook my arm through yours and follow the current of people all going the same way. Suddenly we're out there and the sun is out again. There was a big cloud over it when we entered the building downstairs but it's nowhere to be seen now. You get even more excited and I have to admit I get exited too.

There are a million tall buildings everywhere, there's the Chrysler Building, and Central Park and the water and the Statue of Liberty and yellow cabs everywhere on the streets below. You point to more things and name them. Something about Will Shuester's bridge, Burt's park and the Sean Penn Plaza but I don't think I'm listening that closely.

I'd never admit it out loud but the view is amazing. I'm in this huge city with thousands of new things to explore. I'm here with you and I know we're going to see them. When we're done up here; we're going down there and we're going to see every little thing. That's amazing. Not just because I'm actually alive and I actually can see them, but because I _want_ to see them. I care. I care about something other than it.

I take a few steps back and my spot is instantly filled by other crowding tourists.

"Britt…" I murmur, not nearly loud enough for you to hear it over everything else, but yet you do and turn around quickly. You look at me for a micro-second but you don't need to look longer to know what I want and you walk over to me; losing your awesome view spot in the process.

I lift my hand to tuck your hair behind your ear. I don't know why, it's not like you usually wear it like that and it just came undone. I'm pretty sure you don't even like it like that. No one wears their hair behind their ear unless they're Rachel Berry, or they're hunched over a book cramming for a test, or they're seven. I pull it loose and fix it so it looks almost like it did before I decided to mess with it. You giggle and crap; I realize how nervous I am.

It takes me a couple more minutes before I know how to start talking. You don't say anything. You look at me so I know you're paying attention but you wait patiently for me to be ready. It's funny; you can't wait even ten minutes for an elevator without getting so impatient you almost fall over but you can wait a year for me without so much as a second thought.

"I know we've talked… and stuff, but I've never said I'm sorry." I start. You've said you're sorry a million times and it doesn't make sense to me because I still don't think you have anything to apologize for. It's still all my fault and you deserve to hear that _I'm_ sorry. You open your mouth and I know you're going to try to interrupt before I can tell you but I won't let you.

"Everything you've had to see, and say, and do, and…be this past year. I'm really sorry, Brittany." I say and shake my head at having to again think about putting you through all that. I still can't believe you didn't leave me. You keep telling me not to think like that but it's hard. I would have left me.

"I'm not." You coo. We're already close but you take a step closer anyways and you tilt my head up again. I hadn't noticed it was hanging but it's still hard to meet you eyes. It's always hard to look you in the eye when you're being sweet and I know you're about to be sweet.

"You're the strongest person I know."

"You _really_ think so?" I ask insecurely.

"I _really _do." You say certainly, yet like it's the easiest thing. You brush away some hairs from where the wind stuck them to my bottom lip and I know one of those sweet lady kisses is about to happen. I prop myself up on my toes, and tilt my head up, but I wait for you to kiss me. You lean in, but you tease and your nose brushes against my top lip. I feel you smile and then your lips close around mine. You wrap your arms around me and our faces practically smash together. Your smile again but you're so quick to kiss instead and not break us apart. Your lips fit with mine, Brittany. We just… fit.

A wind picks up and our hair starts flying everywhere. Dark and light hair sticks to our cheeks and our lips. I get your hair in my eye and you get mine in your nose and you giggle into me before pulling away. As soon as we're not kissing anymore the wind stills and you mumble something about _oh sure, now it stops._ I go to kiss you again but before I get a chance you take my hand and you lead me back to edge and cram us in between two ladies looking out over East River. It's pretty tight so you have to stand behind me but I don't mind because your arms slither around my waist and you hug me tight.

"I have something for you." You murmur and hand me a crinkled paper. You can't see me furrow my eyebrows in confusion but I do because I don't understand.

"Throw it." You instruct me excitedly.

"What is it?" I question and if you couldn't magically tell I was confused by sensing my eyebrows before you definitely hear it in my voice now. You usually never have a hard time saying anything but now your lips slide back and forth over my cheek a couple of times in a moment of silence.

"Remember when we talked, like really talked, about _it_ and you told me your two rules?" You explain quietly and as I hear the words my shaky fingers unfold the paper and there they are. In my hands. In written form. My rules.

_Don't get fat._

_Don't let anyone know._

I stare at them for a few more moments. Oh god, where did that lump in my throat come from? I trace my index finger over your delicate hand writing. They don't even look horrible in the soft curves shaping the letters.

"You want me to throw my rules?" I ask weakly and you nod.

"Yes. It's like sending_ it_ flying and… setting yourself free." You're hesitant but hopeful.

"Brittany…" I breathe. Hopeful is good. I just don't want you to be too hopeful. I don't want to let you believe it's over when it may never be completely over. You nuzzle closer. You always do that. When I think we couldn't possibly be any more pressed against each other; you come closer anyway.

"Look, I know it's just a silly piece of paper and it doesn't really mean anything but you've come so far and it's symbolism and… I dunno…" You say and shrug. "For me?"

"For you." I repeat to myself. Just because. I love the sound of that. For you. "Anything."

You hear it and your hand searches for my free one until our fingers are interlocked and almost desperately clinging to each other. I lean forward and stretch out my arm through the fence thingy, waiting for a wind to come and grab the note before I let go.

"No, you have to ball it up." You protest. "Crush it good." You say in a fake deep and dramatic voice. It sounds really funny and I almost drop the paper from forgetting it while laughing. But I bring it back in and ball my fist around it. You were right; symbolism feels kind of good. I even smack it against the stone wall twice before bringing it back out to dangle in the air.

I twist my body slightly and turn my head so I can see your face. Your lips are barely smiling but your eyes are sparkling. You knew it. Through all the ups and downs you knew we'd be here all along, didn't you?

"Together?" I whisper quietly without taking my eyes off your blue ones. I feel your index and middle finger take a walk from my elbow and all the way out to the back of my hand where you wrap yours around it.

"Together." You say matter of factly and then our gaze breaks to watch the paper ball meet its impending death. It would have probable flipped and tossed in the wind a lot more I hadn't balled it up, but now it doesn't take long before I lose sight of it. It doesn't matter. Why would I want to watch it anyways when I can just turn around and look at the prettiest girl in the whole world?

"What?" You ask sheepishly with a little hint of red spreading in your cheeks. It's incredible that you still get shy whenever I look at you like this. I shake my head like it's nothing and swing our interlocked hands between us as we make our way inside again.

"I love you." I say finally. And I do mean _finally_. You freeze and your eyes go wide but it only lasts a second before you break out in the goofiest, loopiest, cutest, happiest smile I've ever seen cross your lips.

"Say it again." You exclaim eagerly and overly excited.

"I love you." I chuckle and barely finish the words again before your arms are wrapped around me and you're lifting me off the ground and spinning me around in the air. I squeal at how it makes my tummy tingle and you laugh your purest, most adorable laugh. I'm kind of dizzy when you stop so I think it's a good thing that you don't let me down right away. Instead you hold me there. Tummy against tummy, chest against chest, nose against nose. You didn't ask me to say it again but what the hell; I can do whatever I want to.

"I love you, Brittany."

"I love you too."


End file.
